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Wizard School Issue #4 Page #11

by admin on June 11, 2012 at 12:01 am
  • Wizard School

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Discussion (53) ¬

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  1. Dusty White
    Dusty White
    June 11, 2012 at 12:31 am | # | Reply

    . . . we got the Gimp* here in the vault

    • Dusty White
      Dusty White
      June 11, 2012 at 12:31 am | # | Reply

      *(from Pulp Fiction)

    • Wackadoodle
      Wackadoodle
      June 11, 2012 at 8:40 pm | # | Reply

      *gots the gimp

      • Dusty White
        Dusty White
        June 11, 2012 at 9:57 pm | # | Reply

        Technically yes– “gots” is the proper vernacular–dammit! I should have known that (gots is my fav werd too!)

  2. max_black0
    max_black0
    June 11, 2012 at 12:34 am | # | Reply

    We got you something better than a tracer.
    Better.

    We got a Tractor!

    • Krestof
      Krestof
      June 11, 2012 at 9:28 am | # | Reply

      Hey, it’s called a “Tracktor”!

  3. Grudgesettler
    Grudgesettler
    June 11, 2012 at 12:45 am | # | Reply

    Shotgun…. shotgun….

  4. Dave
    Dave
    June 11, 2012 at 1:50 am | # | Reply

    Better than a tracer? That door must just open up to Evilmore’s room :)

    • xaviara
      xaviara
      June 11, 2012 at 9:47 am | # | Reply

      +1

      • Dusty White
        Dusty White
        June 11, 2012 at 9:58 pm | # | Reply

        ditto!

  5. Wackadoodle
    Wackadoodle
    June 11, 2012 at 1:59 am | # | Reply

    Enter new character?

  6. Baron Mellow von Yellow
    Baron Mellow von Yellow
    June 11, 2012 at 2:06 am | # | Reply

    Goats love passive aggression? You’d better watch your back, Graham!

    • Heitert3
      Heitert3
      June 11, 2012 at 7:02 am | # | Reply

      Speaking of which, did anyone else read Celeste’s spiel and think, “Graham’s manner of speaking is rubbing off on her”?

      • Baron Mellow von Yellow
        Baron Mellow von Yellow
        June 11, 2012 at 10:56 pm | # | Reply

        I’d say that’s less Graham and more Dingus.

        • xaviara
          xaviara
          June 12, 2012 at 11:19 am | # | Reply

          yes… i can see that

          • Grudgesettler
            Grudgesettler
            June 12, 2012 at 10:27 pm | #

            I honestly think that’s just Celeste. She’s as much a f@#ked up ass as Graham, only with knowledge as opposed to money.

            God…. if the age gap wasn’t so severe and they fell in love and had kids….. we’d have to kill them. The universe would be in danger of disappearing up its own ass.

    • Hilarity Jane
      Hilarity Jane
      June 11, 2012 at 10:39 pm | # | Reply

      Don’t let him fool you – the goat wants to go because he wants to eat the library books.

  7. mrq
    mrq
    June 11, 2012 at 2:29 am | # | Reply

    I say it’s gonna be some hyper-awsome-can-of-beer-made-into-jack-sparrow-compass. (name can be slight different)

    • Grudgesettler
      Grudgesettler
      June 12, 2012 at 10:27 pm | # | Reply

      Your problem was the multi-syllable words. You also forgot the “Faap.”

  8. Keepbro
    Keepbro
    June 11, 2012 at 3:56 am | # | Reply

    We got hairy double-chins!!

  9. Tribalzer0
    Tribalzer0
    June 11, 2012 at 7:05 am | # | Reply

    @Dusty White That was the first thing that popped into my head when I read the last panel.

    • Dusty White
      Dusty White
      June 11, 2012 at 9:59 pm | # | Reply

      Yaay (thanks! :-) )

  10. xaviara
    xaviara
    June 11, 2012 at 9:52 am | # | Reply

    inside the vault they have a real, live dragon – the secret to their wizardly powers [and the source of their beer]. it is just a baby, so they’ve been able to tame it and train it [mostly]. It can smell magic, and so if they give it a little galliflox scent it will track it to its source. It is about the size of a pony [not a hore], and requires a rider to make sure it comes back after finding the magic device [otherwise it will just eat it Goatsie-style and wander off] but unfortunately, everyone there is just a weensie bit big. By big I mean fat. Graham is too smart to jump on the back of a flying monster that wants to eat him, and merrill has disappeared with some of the others for a good old fashioned hicksville welcome, so its up to celeste or goatsie to climb aboard.

    I think we both know who’s gonna ride the dragon to go find the galliflox [and who's gonna go to the library]

    • Oz
      Oz
      June 11, 2012 at 11:43 am | # | Reply

      Either that or they tied a string on it.

      • Jago of the 7 knives
        Jago of the 7 knives
        June 12, 2012 at 2:32 am | # | Reply

        Definitely a string. Or at least invisible bread crumbs leading to the missing golden galliflox.

  11. OBVIATOR
    OBVIATOR
    June 11, 2012 at 12:18 pm | # | Reply

    oz is right, kind of. They probably have a way to summon it back to their vault. Or maybe a magical surveillance device so they can just look at a screen/cauldron and see where it is.

  12. Ruadhan
    Ruadhan
    June 11, 2012 at 12:39 pm | # | Reply

    oh god “TrackTor”…I’m in stitches :P

  13. Tempest8008
    Tempest8008
    June 11, 2012 at 2:09 pm | # | Reply

    It’ll be a hound dog.
    You wait and see.

    They’ve got a big, slobbering, drooling mess of a blood hound and he’s a gonna sniff down that ol’ Galliflox faster ‘n y’all can say, “Hey, he’s ‘a Southern Drawlin’ up the place!”

    • Baron Mellow von Yellow
      Baron Mellow von Yellow
      June 11, 2012 at 11:00 pm | # | Reply

      In the vault?

      How about a mechanical hound, Fahrenheit 451-style?

      • xaviara
        xaviara
        June 12, 2012 at 11:20 am | # | Reply

        but with three heads

    • Elfguy
      Elfguy
      June 11, 2012 at 11:23 pm | # | Reply

      You mean ’tain’t nuthin’ but a houn’ dog? Cryin’ all the time?

    • Freemage
      Freemage
      June 12, 2012 at 3:40 pm | # | Reply

      Hound dog was my first guess, too….

  14. Robert
    Robert
    June 11, 2012 at 5:21 pm | # | Reply

    Now, finally, we get to figure out what a FWUP is!

  15. Jago of the 7 knives
    Jago of the 7 knives
    June 12, 2012 at 2:36 am | # | Reply

    It’s probably a chimera thingy that has the ability to sniff out the golden galliflox wherever it is hidden. This will also introduce a new story arc wherein goatsie and the chimera thing will have a sorta of romantic relationship and have kids. Sorta like Donkey and Dragon in the Shrek series.

    • xaviara
      xaviara
      June 12, 2012 at 11:22 am | # | Reply

      only instead of cute their children will be horrific monsters that no one can look at, and they eat EVERYTHING in sight.

      • Grudgesettler
        Grudgesettler
        June 12, 2012 at 10:32 pm | # | Reply

        And breathe fire. That seems an important part of that.

  16. mrq
    mrq
    June 12, 2012 at 7:54 am | # | Reply

    Hey! It’s THE Vault! It is the great bunker from cold-war times filled with equipment to survive the soon-to-be nuclear apocalypse! I’ve seen one in some game I think…

    • Ray
      Ray
      June 12, 2012 at 2:34 pm | # | Reply

      you mean fallout 3 perhaps?

  17. Ray
    Ray
    June 12, 2012 at 2:33 pm | # | Reply

    in the vault lies….. a dog whistle…. :D

  18. Stampers Saverem
    Stampers Saverem
    June 12, 2012 at 3:41 pm | # | Reply

    As a Library Worker I can only say–

    Celeste!

    Give up all that magic crap and come work for us!!!

    • Hilarity Jane
      Hilarity Jane
      June 12, 2012 at 9:33 pm | # | Reply

      But please don’t bring the goat!

    • Jago of the 7 knives
      Jago of the 7 knives
      June 12, 2012 at 10:24 pm | # | Reply

      Celeste’s Library List of Punishment for Library Violators:

      1. Noisy library users – 1st offense violators turned into frogs for one day and made to eat flies. 2nd offense violators turned into flies for one day;
      2. Sleeping in the library – 1st offense violators turned into pigeons and sent to the park for two days. 2nd offense violators turned into statues for three days.
      3. Eating in the library – 1st offense violators turned into a dog for two days. 2nd offense violators turned into fire hydrants for four days.
      4. Smoking in the library – 1st offense violators turned into a trash can and set at the Female restroom for five days. 2nd offense violators turned into a commode set at the male restroom.
      5. Returning overdue books to the library – 1st offense violators turned into a mop for three days. 2nd offense violator turned into the library’s welcome mat for one week.
      6. Drunk or drinking liquor inside the library – 1st offense violator turned into a basketball for three days. 2nd offense violator turned into basketball players shoes for one week.
      7. Disrespect of Library Personnel – 1st offense violator turned into a football for five days. 2nd offense violators turned into a football players jock strap.
      8. Mutilation of Library Books – 1st offense violators sentence to guest at Oprah for at least twelve episodes. 2nd offense violators sentence to guest at Jerry Springer for at least 36 episodes.
      9. Lost Library Card – 1st offense violators sentenced to become Library Slave for one month. 2nd offense violators sentenced to become Librarian for all of Eternity!

      • xaviara
        xaviara
        June 13, 2012 at 8:10 am | # | Reply

        not only is this ridiculously specific, but it is also ridiculously justified

        • Stampers Saverem
          Stampers Saverem
          June 14, 2012 at 8:55 am | # | Reply

          And Amen to THAT, too!

      • Stampers Saverem
        Stampers Saverem
        June 14, 2012 at 9:02 am | # | Reply

        And Punishment for Needlessly Annoying Grumpy Library Circulation Manager [my job description, except for the grumpy] with Pointless Stupidity [i.e. Asking for the Library's Hours when the sign is right there in front of them--Really!]–

        Library Slave for all Eternity is unnecessarily sent to fetch something from the Dark, Damp & Creepy Store Room where the Giant Spiders Live and a Janitor was once struck by lightning [The lightning part is actually True--He survived, but they never had a coffee break in THAT room, again!]

        • Jago of the 7 knives
          Jago of the 7 knives
          June 14, 2012 at 10:00 pm | # | Reply

          Mdm. Saverem, I actually envy your library for having a Dark, Damp and Creepy Store Room with Giant Spiders living in it. Our library only boast a Dark, Damp and Creepy Closet with an Alligator living in it, and the damn thing don’t eat pesky-annoying library visitors! Someday though…someday…

          • Stampers Saverem
            Stampers Saverem
            June 15, 2012 at 9:04 am | #

            Oh, ya’ just gotta’ train yer’ gator right, is all….!

            [Personally, I think this particular Library Building was designed by a rather Psychotic Architect who had a thing against conveniently located bathrooms--

            There are exactly NONE on the Main Floor!]

      • alaskanSalami
        alaskanSalami
        July 26, 2012 at 9:24 am | # | Reply

        With punishments like THAT one would never wish to place a single toe out of the line.

    • Stampers Saverem
      Stampers Saverem
      June 14, 2012 at 8:54 am | # | Reply

      Amen to THAT!!

  19. Chariset
    Chariset
    June 12, 2012 at 11:49 pm | # | Reply

    A dog? It’s a dog, isn’t it? Please be a dog.

  20. Notimmature
    Notimmature
    June 14, 2012 at 7:14 am | # | Reply

    Since when did Goatsie’s nose/eyes look like a dick

    • Stampers Saverem
      Stampers Saverem
      June 14, 2012 at 9:03 am | # | Reply

      Apparently, since you just pointed it out!

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    • Wizard School Issue #4 Page #10
      September 21, 2012 at 2:20 pm | #

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